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When Grief Comes

March 21, 2014

For a limited time – just a few days – my book When Grief Comes is available as an e-book for $1.99.

Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and CDC should all have the book.

Here are a couple of endorsements.

Dr. Kirk Neely has written a marvelous book on grief. Dr. Neely’s shepherding heart as a pastor and his rich experience as a Christian counselor make When Grief Comes an invaluable resource. Kirk’s storytelling, his skillful use of scripture, and his own personal experience as one acquainted with grief combine to bring encouragement and hope to those who are grieving. When Grief Comes will also be helpful to all who aspire to give comfort to those who walk through the valley of the shadow of death.

Cliff Barrows

In less than 100 pages this author, counselor and pastor, covers most of the ways in which we encounter loss and manage grief. What sets this book apart from the many self help books on coping with grief, is the personal journey this writer has made with five generations of his family. He demonstrates the strengths that come from serving in a community which has known him and his ancestors. Unlike Gertrude Stein, who found no “there” there, this author has a strong sense of place and loss, perhaps with roots stretching back to that great Southern loss, the “Recent Unpleasantness”, in the mid-1800’s. All of which is put in perspective by his profound understanding of the Old Testament and New Testament writings. He leads the grieving person to discover sources of strength and hope. He has listened attentively to the stories of children, youth, adults and elderly persons who have faced differing sources of loss. Their voices are clearly heard and faithfully reported.

One of the repeated joys of this book is the succinct style in which he writes, bringing solace, insight, humor and new light to the grief journey we all make.

Kirk Neely is a worthy successor to his mentor and teacher, Wayne E. Oates. Both speak from scripture to the human condition. If you read only one book on grief, I recommend it be When Grief Comes. Such a joyful read should be shared.

Clarence Y. Barton

Here is an excerpt.

To The Reader

As much as I enjoy reading, I understand how difficult it is to read and cry at the same time. I found that when I wrote these pages, I had to give myself a break. Whether reading or writing, we can only dwell on grief and sorrow, death and dying, for a time, and then we need relief.
Please, be gentle with yourself. I want these pages to be a blessing to you, not a burden. You don’t ever have to finish this book. It is written so that you can read a little, and stop, and then come back later. I have tried to write remembering how difficult it is to read when your heart is broken and your eyes are blurred with tears.
The book has several features that will help you take short cuts through the deep forest of understanding your grief.
• The detailed table of contents will help you quickly find sections that are better suited to your grief at various points in your walk through bereavement.
• A list of comforting scriptures is included to help you quickly access passages that may help.
• Though there are many books on grief, I have included a brief annotated list of a few that I have found especially helpful.
There are some things I cannot provide for you that will help. You will need to supply these things yourself as you read these pages.
• Something soothing to drink. Choose whatever is calming to you.
• A little comfort food. Chocolate seems to help many people.
• A sense of humor. If all you do is cry, this journey becomes very boringtedious.
• A box of tissues. If you need permission to cry, remember the shortest verse in the Bible, “Jesus wept.”
Maybe you have heard the quip. “I was feeling despondent and someone said, ‘Cheer up, things could be worse.’ So, I cheered up, and sure enough, things got worse.”
This is not intended to be a cheer up book. Those usually make us feel worse, not better when we are grieving.
Rather, this is a book of encouragement. I have been through deep sorrow. I have experienced the faithful tender healing of God. I have every confidence that God will be with you as God has been with me.
I know that there are times when a grief-stricken soul is unable to pray. We may feel that God is absent, that he has abandoned us. I have learned that in those times, it is helpful if someone prays for us. My prayer for you is that the God of all comfort will bind up your broken heart and strengthen you with his grace.

Kirk H. Neely

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